You could have fitted Pat Smullen's ego in an eggcup, it was never about him

I have an innate ability to somehow squeeze my size nines into my ginormous gob on a regular basis; it is a family thing, my dad does it too, and my sister is better at it than either of us.

Halfway through labour, just after my wife had vomited for a third time, I thought it the perfect moment to ask her whether the process was as painful as it is made out to be.

Anyway, that brings me to Listowel. It was September, 2015 and Jealika had just won a 47-65 handicap. We were on our way out to the parade ring to grab a quote from winning trainer Mark Fahey when Pat Smullen passed by.