Gordon Elliott: 'I still lie in bed every night thinking about Envoi Allen'

Gordon Elliott has said the departure of top horses like Envoi Allen and Sir Gerhard was the lowest point of his fall from grace that followed the emergence in February of a photo of him sitting astride a dead horse.

As Elliott prepares to return on Thursday following his subsequent six-month suspension from the sport, the trainer opened up to the Racing Post in an exclusive interview for Monday's newspaper in which he discusses his feelings about being back on track, his quest for forgiveness, his thoughts about his fellow trainers and much more.

Asked about the time he saw the likes of Envoi Allen, Sir Gerhard and Quilixios move to rival yards, Elliott said: "That was the lowest point throughout it all."

He added: "I had worked very hard to source those horses, and then they were gone. Just like that. When Envoi Allen was here, there wasn't a night I didn't lie in bed thinking about him. And now that he is gone, there still isn't a night I don't lie in bed thinking about him."

Two of that prize trio went on to win at the Cheltenham Festival, although the pain was eased by messages of support from Henry de Bromhead and Willie Mullins as Elliott revealed: "When Quilixios won the Triumph Hurdle, Henry de Bromhead rang me to say 'Well done', and he made a point of acknowledging me on television, which was decent of him. And Sir Gerhard hadn't crossed the line in the Champion Bumper when I got a text from Willie Mullins."

Elliott has lost only a dozen horses in total and said: "I have never had a cross word with any of the owners who left. I still speak to them all and the gate is always open. I understand completely why they had to go. Having said that, I still have a brilliant bunch of owners here who have stuck by me and want to support me and want to see me get back to where I was."

Exclusive Gordon Elliott interview: 'I'm sorry for what I did. A chance to move on is all I'm after' (Members' Club)

Read more from Gordon Elliott in our exclusive interview, available online for Members' Club Ultimate subscribers from 6pm on Sunday or in Monday's Racing Post newspaper. Join Members' Club here, select 'Get Ultimate Monthly' and enter the code EXCLUSIVE to get your first month for £10.

Read more on this subject:

Gordon Elliott admits 'shocking' photo is real and apologises

Gordon Elliott: 'I'll spend life paying for indefensible moment of madness'

'Shocking' image forced Cheveley Park to remove their horses from Gordon Elliott

'It's daunting but exciting' – Denise Foster takes over from Gordon Elliott

Nearly 75% off Racing Post Members' Club!Members' Club is the only subscription racing fans and punters need in order to stay informed and make smarter betting decisions. Features include early access to the Racing Post digital newspaper, exclusive news and interviews, premium tips and form study tools to assist with betting. Select 'Get Ultimate Monthly' and enter code EXCLUSIVE to get your first month for just £10*

Subscribe now

If you decide that Members' Club is not for you, then you can cancel at anytime by contacting us.

*Members' Club Ultimate Monthly first month will be charged at £10, renews at full price thereafter