'I'm single-handedly trying to bring up my father and it's not going well - I'm 22 and he's still 18'

If this were a cosy 'lifestyle' magazine, like Homes & Flowers & Sofas & Stuff, I'd be preparing to lead you on an idyllic stroll through the tasteful soft furnishings and exquisite decor of the Old Malthouse in Upper Lambourn. We'd take a guided tour of its delightful country garden on our way to conducting an interview with a pretty English rose next to a turquoise-tiled swimming pool that might well be glistening in the Berkshire sunshine.

It would be all soft focus and quite expensive, and everybody would sit down for breakfast at 8.30 in their cream linen suits and straw hats and you'd all feel slightly inadequate that your own sorry lives look nothing like this.

This, however, is the Racing Post and we like our sport and our truth unvarnished. Yes, there is a swimming pool, but this is a working stables and it's bustling and full of strong opinions. By the time I arrive, at 10am, Jamie Osborne (trainer) has already worked several lots on the local gallops and is prowling mischievously in the kitchen; his wife Katie O'Sullivan (artist) is painting glorious racehorses to a looming deadline in her studio; Saffie Osborne (daughter, jockey), who I've actually come to see, has ridden out for near neighbour and great ally Ed Walker and is enjoying a quiet moment with her Jack Russell terrier, Biscuit.