'Real courage . . . is when you know you're licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what'
Aisling Crowe shares some of her thoughts on the loneliness of the sale ring with Good Morning Bloodstock readers
Good Morning Bloodstock is the Racing Post's daily morning email and presented online as a sample.
Here, Aisling Crowe shares her feelings on selling her first homebred yearling – subscribers can get more great insight every Monday to Friday.
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'You never really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view . . . until you climb inside of his skin and walk around in it.'
To Kill A Mockingbird, Harper Lee
The underlined quotes from the copy of To Kill A Mockingbird, learned by heart so they could be regurgitated in essay form for the Junior Cert English exam, have now become the cliched subject of thousands of inspirational Instagram quotes and memes that populate social media feeds.
Their ubiquity might lessen their impact but it doesn't make them any less true.
I received yet another lesson in the veracity of that line from Atticus Finch last week when I presented my first homebred for sale at the Tattersalls Ireland September Yearling Sale.
It's not that as a sales reporter I was ignorant of the realities of life as a breeder and seller for so many people, but the nature of sales coverage forces the focus to be on the headline acts, the horses who bring the hammer down trailing noughts in their wake. They are the minority at each sale but they dominate the words, videos, tweets, reports and press releases because we are all in the business of accentuating the positive.
The reality for breeders is quite different away from the headlines, the trite words about how challenging the market is no consolation when those market realities are the ones you are living.
I had no experience in owning or breeding a horse prior to this. I was a sports journalist with a passion for horses and racing who discovered bloodstock as an adjunct to racing, and developed a fascination with pedigrees.
Upon finally joining the ranks of the full-time employed I indulged my passion and decided to buy a mare. It was meant to be only one but I bought two, as I didn't think it fair to keep one horse without a companion, as friendly and horse-loving as my goats are.
I'm not recounting the story of the past almost three years, nor am I going to give an in-depth explanation of my decisions or choices. Writing about my personal life is deeply uncomfortable for me, something I avoid but I'm sharing this because well, I promised my editor I'd write about it, and also, even though it seems somewhat self-indulgent and anathema to me, I want to show that I really do understand and care about the reality of life as a breeder, because it is my life too.
Money isn't the consideration here, although I've got none.
I went into the sale with the understanding that I was not going to recoup the financial outlay of the past two and a half years. I did not have any expectation of financial reward – the hoped-for pedigree updates that every breeder dreams of receiving did not come for this filly and her family, unlike my remaining mare and foal.
Lady is a beautiful filly but is vertically challenged and, in the unforgiving pageant of the sales, that was also going to count against her.
Prior to the auction, I felt I was realistic in my expectations. Homework had been done – I've notebooks piled high in my office with the stats of every single day of each sale I have reported upon for almost five years now – so I knew that the median price for Part Two was €6,000 in 2023 and, having kept an even keener eye on the preceding yearling sales than I normally would, there was plenty to indicate that it would be even lower this time around. In the event it turned out to be drastically lower at €4,000.
I was proud of Lady (my pretty, slightly neurotic chestnut filly) and I was excited about the world seeing her. I also felt privileged that someone like me had bred, raised and cared for a racehorse.
I don't come from a horsey background, nor do I come from a wealthy one either. I didn't have ponies growing up and nobody in my family has ever been involved in racing as far as I know, so even having a mare, yearling and foal is a massive deal. I love having my own horses, caring for them, nurturing them and watching them grow.
During bleak times, they have been what has kept me going.
Standing at the side of the ring, knowing that not a single person in that auditorium was bidding on my filly, was such a horrible feeling. The only comparable experience to which I've been subjected is standing in the middle of a roundabout at rush hour having been involved in a car crash, when it felt as if every driver, cyclist and bus passenger in the city was gawping at my shaking form which was illuminated by the neon glow of the blue lights.
There were no flashing lights on Thursday night but I felt as if I was standing in the full glare of the spotlight. It was awful.
I felt that Lady had been rejected, that she was unwanted and it was such a painful realisation.
I wanted this horse, if I could have afforded to race her and keep her I would have done, because I believe in her, but I don't have the money to allow me to do that. It felt like I was the only one who did. I wanted her to be alive, she is here because of me, I've cared for her and she matters to me but not to anyone else.
I feel like I have failed Lady.
I also felt deeply for Olive O'Connor, who consigned Lady, and her team that did such a wonderful job over the last few weeks in caring for her and preparing her for her public debut.
Their care and consideration is real and genuine, and I feel that I failed them somehow, that I let them down by not being able to find a buyer for a filly they had worked with and looked after.
The worst thing is, my experience wasn't an isolated one.
The clearance rate on Thursday was 72 per cent. The average price of those horses who sold was €6,647, which means that the average breeder lost a considerable amount of money last week because that average price is nowhere near the cost of producing a yearling from conception to sale.
Even the top lot on the day would have been a loss. The New Bay colt made €36,000 but his sire's advertised fee in 2022, the year the colt was conceived, was €37,500.
This is not to single out Tattersalls Ireland; I couldn't speak any more highly of the team there who were nothing but welcoming and supportive, their attention to detail and knowledge was second to none and I have nothing but praise for them.
This week I will be reporting from Book Two of the Goffs Orby Sale and there will be so many more people in the same position as I was last week. Last year the sale average was €23,248 and the median was €18,000, and you can be certain those figures won't be met this week.
Selling for the average would barely cover the cost of production, while my next stint in the sales press room will be the Goffs Autumn Yearling Sale, where last year's average was €7,906 and the median came in at €5,000.
This is an industry where the hard work, dedication and love of the people who breed and care for the animals that provide a thrill for so many on the track is not valued, it's not rewarded and that is such an icily crushing feeling.
Harper Lee also wrote: ". . . real courage . . . is when you know you're licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what."
That's true for the majority of people breeding and selling racehorses.
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Must-read story
“If Godolphin do enter the fray this week, it will be fascinating to see which stallion’s stock they target,” writes James Thomas as he considers some plotlines that could shape this week’s Goffs Orby Sale.
Pedigree pick
There is a terrible juxtaposition between the previous 1,400-odd words and the pedigree pick for Tuesday afternoon.
At Cork in the mile fillies’ maiden (3.40), the sale-topper from last year's Goffs Orby Book One Sale makes her debut for the Coolmore and Ballydoyle axis. Minnie Hauk appears to be named for the American mezzo-soprano whose interpretation of the title role in Bizet's Carmen transformed the opera's reputation and fortunes.
This Minnie Hauk is a daughter of Frankel and MV Magnier dropped €1,850,000 to acquire the half-sister to Group 2 Summer Mile winner and Group 1 Prix d'Ispahan second Tilsit.
Camas Park Stud consigned Minnie Hauk at Goffs and on Wednesday they offer her No Nay Never half-sister as lot 370.
They are out of Multilingual, a Dansili full-sister to Group 3 winner Remote and a half-sister to multiple Group 1 winner and leading sire Kingman. Their dam Zenda won the Poule d'Essai des Pouliches and is a Zamindar half-sister to the great Oasis Dream.
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